Paranoid: Exhibiting or characterized by extreme and irrational fear or distrust of others.

When does someone go from being rational to paranoid? That question had been going through my mind recently. A few days after a recent trip back to Chicago with my wife, she woke up not feeling well. The first thing that crossed my mind was H1N1. She exhibited a few of the symptoms. I even looked it up on a website where you can diagnose yourself. They MUST know what they are talking about. It's the Internet and everything there has to be true. I ordered her to move into another bedroom and stay the heck away from me. She probably picked it up on the airplane or being around people. Remember that airplanes are a human petri dish. That's what the Internet says anyway.

I had meeting that afternoon at work and informed everyone that my wife might have H1N1... the Internet told me so. I instructed those in the meeting to stay at least seven feet away from me. There were no chances being taken here by golly. When I returned home that evening, my wife wasn't feeling well at all. On went the face mask. Do I don rubber gloves too? So many things to think about. Later that evening, I noticed a slightly sore throat. Oh no, I was infected! What next? I went straight to my own room and to bed.

The next morning (Saturday) I woke... I wasn't dead, and didn't even feel sick. The wife however was still under the weather, but this morning her symptoms didn't morph into something out of this world, but more into a head cold--no fever, runny nose and congestion. Dodged a bullet this time I guess, but I wasn't taking any chances. I was staying as far away as humanly possible since I didn't want to get sick. I spent the rest of the day disinfecting everything I possibly could. Sunday brought no significant changes to my wife or I. She was still sick. I wasn't. Back to disinfecting....

Monday morning came around, and it was time to get up and go to work. Oh no, I wasn't feeling well. Body aches and even a slight fever. Guess I didn't dodge the bullet. In fact, I think I now have the flu. I feel miserable and am going back to bed. Tuesday there was no change. By Wednesday my fever had subsided and I was feeling better. So was my wife. Crisis evaded.

I guess I shouldn't take everything I find on the Internet as gospel. Let common sense prevail!